Aligning Leadership and Empathy | Hortense le Gentil

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Breaking Free from Limiting Beliefs to Lead with Impact

Hortense le Gentil shares how her experience in show jumping taught her key leadership lessons in empathy, trust, and alignment. Hortense also explores the shift from traditional keynotes to interactive fireside chats, emphasizing the importance of authenticity in leadership and thought leadership.

What do horses and leadership have in common? According to executive leadership coach and author of The Unlocked Leader: Dare to Free Your Own Voice, Lead with Empathy, and Shine Your Light in the World Hortense le Gentil, a lot more than you might think. In this episode of Leveraging Thought Leadership, Hortense shares how lessons learned from show jumping shaped her understanding of empathy, communication, and trust—core elements of great leadership. She explores how leaders, like riders, must align with their teams, anticipate obstacles, and build trust to achieve success.

Hortense’s journey to becoming a world-renowned executive coach wasn’t conventional. She didn’t set out to be a coach—she simply wanted to help others. Over time, her unique insights and human-centered approach to leadership attracted top executives and organizations looking to go beyond strategy and truly connect with their teams.

In this conversation, Peter and Hortense discuss the difference between transactional coaching and transformative coaching. They dive into the common challenges executives face—self-doubt, old narratives, and the struggle to balance strategic execution with authentic leadership. Hortense reveals how she helps leaders break free from limiting beliefs and redefine their leadership identity.

The discussion also touches on the evolving landscape of thought leadership, the shift from traditional keynote speaking to more interactive formats like fireside chats, and why authenticity is the key to making a real impact. If you’re ready to unlock your leadership potential and shine your light in the world, this episode is a must-listen.

Three Key Takeaways

Leadership is about alignment and trust. Just like in show jumping, leaders must align with their teams, anticipate obstacles, and build trust to achieve success. Leadership isn’t about control—it’s about connection.

Authenticity drives impact. Leaders who embrace their true selves and lead with empathy create stronger, more engaged teams. Authenticity is the key to unlocking leadership potential and making a meaningful impact.

The landscape of thought leadership is evolving. Traditional keynotes are being replaced by more interactive formats like fireside chats, allowing for deeper, more personalized engagement with audiences.

 

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Transcript

Peter Winick And welcome, welcome, welcome. This is Peter Winick. I’m the founder and CEO at Thought Leadership Leverage. And you’re joining us on the podcast today. My podcast guest today is all translations. He’ll get an amazing background. She’s an executive leadership coach and author. She’s a world renowned executive leadership coach, a speaker and author. Her latest book, which came out last year, is called The Unlock Leader Dare to Free Your Own Voice, Lead with empathy and Shine Your Light in the World. That was published by Wiley. And instead of me telling you how amazing and interesting she is, I’d rather just talk to her directly, given that she’s here with me. Welcome. How are you today?

Hortense le Gentil I’m very good. I’m so happy to be here. Thank you for having me. Yeah. So tell me about.

Peter Winick Your journey and your path. And there’s a bit of a horse story in here as well.

Hortense le Gentil I think there are some horses around. Yes. So I took this new road because to arrive where I am today and to respond to my calling when I quit my coaching, everything I started, I was in France because I was born and raised in France, as you can say with my accent. And I was surrounded by horses. And my life was.

Peter Winick All about horses.

Hortense le Gentil And I was a competitor. I was a show jumper. And then I says, no one reflects on the past. And when I look back, I understand that at that moment, I learned a lot about sheep. I learned about empathy, how to talk to this horse that didn’t get in touch or how to make it jump, how to make wine with yourself and how you can do that. And especially when you are when you when you work on showjumping and you want to jump. So you have a lot to work with. You need to communicate correctly. You need to be one with your horse. And this is like, you know, three steps before the obstacles again, even if you don’t if it is even for you. I don’t know. Do you do you ride? No, no, no. Okay. But I can explain very well. It’s your show to work, to prepare your horse to be in front of, you know exactly where you want to go. And then three steps before moving in your unit, you trust your horse. Your horse is going to jump. That’s you If your horse and then you stay with, you just.

Peter Winick I just find it fascinating people’s origin stories and where they take lessons from. And to them, it seems so glaringly obvious that that’s a leadership lesson, right? I think there’s a shorthand way of describing what you do when the executive coach and executive leadership side. It starts with a horse and you prevent people from being horse’s asses, right? It’s like using empathy. Right. So tell me a little bit about I feel like on some level today, everybody says their coach and their coaches and their coaches, your coach, you’re actually a real executive leadership and development coach. What is that? Give us an example of who’s hiring you. Maybe not by name and what are they hoping to get out of a coaching engagement?

Hortense le Gentil So I’m not going to say I’m not going to answer directly to your question because I want you to jump on what you said. And I agree with that. So there’s a lot of coaches and then I think everyone is different and why they are different because it’s a question of human being. It’s a question of what is important for you and what you want to teach and the empathy that is and how you connect with your clients. And in my case, I work for large corporations for four years and as an entrepreneur for more than two decades. So I was not born a coach. And then I did discover that I could help others, you know, only on me continue to grow. And it was when, you know, I’ve been through all my journey, I learned what I learned. And as everyone, you know, up and down, if you could, to moments of whatever it is. And then when I was asked, my friend told me, you, can you help my friend? We’re going to win. So you.

Peter Winick Just, you know.

Hortense le Gentil So much. You have people said, yes, I will. And this friend told me and by the way, you should your coach and teacher, I just told him I don’t know what he’s a coach about. I know the coach, but I’m going to have your friend. And I think.

Peter Winick I was right. So I but I think that’s interesting because your objective in that scenario was a friend asked you to help. Somebody said, Sure, happy to be helpful. And they put this label, this put you out to put your what, call back coaching. And you’re like.

Hortense le Gentil Okay, call.

Peter Winick It what you will. I really helping them, which I think that’s really important because not every coach has that worldview or that perspective.

Hortense le Gentil Yeah, it was mine. And then, you know, the first when I have that, that that’s fun. At that moment I put that part and I did discover that, yeah, everything. And then I could give back and help others with that. And then after and I, I will answer your question and then after, it’s because you a journey, because this is you and because it was me at that time. What I learned in my life was you need to be in line with yourself. So I do. It’s the way it works. And the door going to open, clients are going to come or it’s not your way and it is fine because I was not looking for that. And then what I do is. I realized that I was good. And what was important for me is to tell people about. Leaders should be human as a leader. Being vulnerable is okay. That you need to connect with your. You need to unlock yourself. You need to. Have the point to lead. By yourself. So it’s. It’s your way. And then I started this. Mission. It’s set to air with the first book and then the second book on how you align yourself, how you connect with yourself, You know what is important for you, how you want to be remembered as a leader, and then to answer your questions. So it was long. But people come to me because of very often they are CEOs or young CEOs or not from CEOs in transition or their senior executives. And this feels that it’s not about any more doing it. It’s about being we are human beings. We are not human doing like the horse, like, you know, the metaphor of the horse, you know, it’s not going to change. It’s your company, it’s your people. Then you have to take care of your people. Your horses are rich.

Peter Winick Because some would argue that on the one hand, if I am a younger, not so young CEO, what kind of coaching, what I need, I get everything there needs to be. I you know, I’m at the top of my game, right? I did. The board is entrusted me to run the company. My compensation is great. I’ve got a strategy, I’m executing, I’ve got a leadership team, etc.. And then you’re saying, Well, yeah, but that’s the point of your life. It’s almost sort of natural that you have the luxury of saying, okay, well what else? Right, right. So obviously you have the, the strategic thinking skills and the critical thinking and, you know, you’re like, they’re not coming to you to say, I don’t know how to set strategy or I don’t know how to I don’t know the ins and outs of the nuances of my industry. It’s very personal. And it’s also not something that they necessarily know how or want to engage with their team and their group with.

Hortense le Gentil Yes, exactly. Exactly. Peter, this is exactly it, because I don’t want nobody to choose to do that. You don’t know all of us as human beings. We are naturally and we are initially good at that point into it. You know, you’re tense. You can hide, you can switch. And it’s not anymore. It’s, you know, you know everything about strategy and whatever or your sense of order consistently are going to do that. This is not what I’m talking about. What I’m talking about exactly what you say this. Okay. How can I evolve? How I can know? Do something for others? How can I make this company much better? And by the way, you will be more successful and much more happy by doing because? Because this is another way to look at things.

Peter Winick If you’re enjoying this episode and leveraging thought leadership. Please make sure to subscribe. If you’d like to help spread the word about our podcast. Please leave a five-star review at ratethispodcast.com/ltl and share it with your friends. We’re available on Apple Podcasts and on all major listening apps as well as at ThoughtLeadershipLeverage.com/podcast.

Peter Winick So can you give me an example with that without obviously violating any confidences of sort of an evolution or breakthroughs or things that have changed in your client as a result of your work? What’s the before and after? What has the light bulb have gone off for them as a result of having this type of code?

Hortense le Gentil So I can take an example of, you know, this was years ago and I was at a client or was expected to be the next to you, the company. Okay. Ensure sufficient time. And then in order to do that, you had to interview with, of course, the board members. Right. And then out of the blue. Behavior would change completely all the time. You didn’t listen. You were kind of this kind of a person. And so everyone was surprised and said what happened to him? And then came to me and told me, I have totally don’t know what happened to me, but can you help me? And I said, okay. So we’re going to figure it out. And then, like you remembered a time long ago when he was a student and he was, you know, in order to run. Have to pass an exam in order to be guided. And the influence of this kind of a teacher or professor, he had to he had to talk. And what are the what is the teacher? He can sit and talk to him all the time. All the time. And did you still cry? Can you imagine your 20 something you prepared was extra student could have expected. And then it created the trauma and was not aware of that trauma because it was you know, he was shocked. And so second thing is, because it was not enough. The teacher told you, a young guy. I don’t know what you’re going to do in your life, but I can promise you will never used you because we can see all your emotion and you’re on your face. Then imagine this young guy leaving this room. Well, he was great. You graduated, but. Yeah. But why was he stuck? And then the voices would tell you. You promise you wouldn’t give up for you. Then in countries where you would you for the first time you work in front of the situation to be, you know, to be expected or to abuse you. He’s unconscious, talking. Okay, talk. Don’t think and touch you and tell your story to what you have to say. And then it was not appropriate, of course. But it was not the way. So we walked on back. It was Trump. He was, you know, what I call, you know, the name Trump in that book. He was Trump. He was there. So we had to we found the source and then the voice. And then in order to escape to that, you had to be aware of it and then to connect it to. Is it true you can abuse you? Of your speech was not. Is it true that are you is it helpful today? No. Right. So you ask this question, is it true you try event and it helpful today? And he said, No, I know. So I said, okay, what about Psycho? And then we work on that call and how to do it because I’m that easy. Because they go means going to that.

Peter Winick So I mean very easy to say, very difficult to act.

Hortense le Gentil Very difficult to do. And then we do it. We did that. And then. And then. And then you saw me. And for you, what could happen is because he was himself, he was like he was sweet, You know, he was ready to write his own story. And then we walked on, okay, who are you? What kind of leader do you want to be? How are you want to show up for your team, you know, and. And how the general being general. Yeah. Are you said a lot of being said about why we should deal with it. It’s not much about how we do that. Where do we start? So the book and my work is about that. Where do you start with where do you start and where are the boundaries?

Peter Winick In the last few minutes that we have together talking really about sort of the business side of thought leadership as it relates to your work? So there’s this publishing, there’s coaching. Tell me maybe some of the things that you’ve learned from when you started to where you are now about the business side of this, Because coaching on some levels is not an easy business, right? It’s typically time for money or some variation of that. And writing books, we could debate whether that’s actually a business model or not. But give me a sense of sort of this the business landscape that you’ve observed.

Hortense le Gentil Yeah. What I observe is more and more When you coach. Do you feel exactly where you are good at? And then, you know, focusing on that, you will be recognized for that. And then you know, what the business model is, is more people are talking about me. It’s more in the mouth. And then coaching and this workshop, I do Workshop. I do. I don’t do keynotes. I do fireside chats because. Because I don’t believe in keynotes. I think, you know, people are going to sleep or that the kids, you know, interact with the public and then that is fun. You get a lot. You have some other people and you’re like, you’ll hear, you know, just and you chance, you know, divine mentions. And then and then you spread the word. Because at the end of the day, when you are your coach, I don’t know for everybody, but for me, I know, I know. It’s because I would like to help you to unlock and to win this. And that is important to go back to the fireside chat because I think there’s something interesting going on in the marketplace in that it used to be either you’re a keynote speaker or you’re not a keynote speaker right now, and maybe Covid accelerated is who knows, right. So, you know, Covid happens and now OTAs who are known for their stage presence and their command of the audience and all these sort of things have to change the way that they deliver and they resort to zoom and figure that out. But a lot of the skills and abilities that they have on stage don’t work on it, right? It’s not about being big, loud and charisma or whatever. And I think the Fireside chats an extension of that, right? Because I see more of I just got back from Europe and saw a lot of this an event with a client where when it’s a keynote, basically what we’re saying is audience is the most important woman in the room right now for an hour. She’s so brilliant. And so there’s and then then just shut up and listen. And maybe there’s five minutes for Q&A. And that’s really it’s really hard to keep an audience, particularly a large audience of a thousand people riveted when their phones are in their pocket and, you know, whatever everything you have to say. And now there’s this fireside chat thing, whether it’s you sitting down with the CEO or the head of H.R. Or even professional journalists or something, there’s something I don’t really have the word, but cozier, more authentic, more intimate because it’s not stage. Sometimes you see the same keynote or three times and you know a minute three 311 they’re going to talk about their flight. You’re like, okay, this is this is like what? You’re going to sing Broadway show every night.

Peter Winick Tell me how you experiencing the fireside chat?

Hortense le Gentil Yeah, it’s really me. Because, you know, I like to connect with people. So, you know, you can you have empathy, you can you can sue people, you can add depth to conversation. And it’s all conversation for me.

Peter Winick You know.

Hortense le Gentil I prepared of course, I prepare people for everybody, everything. But it’s more about you. It’s more about okay to you. Here I go. We’re going to talk about that. Let me explain. So somebody is going to ask me questions. Okay. We can explain and introduce the concept of for my tribe and. And that’s different. And then give. And then I make you work.

Peter Winick Right?

Hortense le Gentil Even. Even if it’s 1000 people, I say, okay, so talk to the person near you. And then it’s interactive because you talk about something. Okay, let’s try. Okay. And if I tell you, you, you can answer the question or whatever it is, and then it’s I think it’s. More power for everybody, more powerful, more fun. And then you learn really something. I teach one little things. You know, even if you are very, you know, like, I don’t want to.

Peter Winick You don’t come to.

Hortense le Gentil You know, to the walks up. So if you don’t have it Interesting in it, but then if you are there.

Peter Winick Also give you an opportunity to. Tune in to the. The vibe, for lack of a better term of the audience, better in terms of, Hey, if you do this, I checked and you’re very high energy efficient. This has been a hard year for company. I know that you went through a CEO turnover and you lost market share in the stock and that has been a bad year. Let’s talk about that or congratulations you’ve like versus I think oftentimes with the keynote, everybody gets the same this exact same energy and it’s all great. Well, it’s not always all great. Sometimes patients are struggling and they’re having.

Hortense le Gentil Issues.

Peter Winick Or, you know, successes and issues. They’re going through a digital transformation, but they’re behind the curve.

Hortense le Gentil Yeah, exactly. And especially today. And then, yes, you can make me just say if I can only do it and then yeah, so we can talk about just years or if everything is going very well. I went to work next.

Peter Winick And I also think the last point I’ll make on this before we wrap is a big piece of your work is about authenticity. Is about empathy and about being connected. And I love what you said. I like doing the fireside chats better. It’s more me. It feels better for me. So you’re delivering something that’s more aligned with who you are. Oftentimes what we see with a keynote or it’s almost like the person that gets on stage is a caricature of the real human that they might be. If you were having a glass of wine with them that evening. It’s not a creation that a fictitious character, but they have to be in this certain mindset, a certain role for 43 minutes when the lighting on stage.

Hortense le Gentil So yeah, yeah, it’s very, very intimacy.

Peter Winick So there we go. I appreciate this has been a fantastic conversation. I appreciate work and thank you. Thank you for spending time with us today.

Hortense le Gentil Thank you for having me, Peter. Thank you. Have a lovely day.

Peter Winick To learn more about Thought Leadership Leverage, please visit our website at ThoughtLeadershipLeverage.com. To reach me directly, feel free to email me at Peter at Thought Leadership Leverage dot com. And please subscribe to Leveraging Thought Leadership on iTunes or your favorite podcast app to get your weekly episode automatically.